An Early Christmas Gift

So we have now heard back from Brandy (the genetics nurse) at ECU as well as my midwife, Mandy.  When I saw the phone number from ECU my stomach instantly dropped.  All I could think of was the last call and the news I had gotten.  As soon as I had picked up the phone and learned who it was my response was, "Oh no...."

So Brandy wasted no time diving in to the test results.  "You are low risk for Trisomy 13.  You are low risk for Trisomy 18.  You are low risk for Trisomy 21," said Brandy.  "I'm sorry.....what??!", was my response to her.  "You're low risk across the board!", she reiterated.  And I think I just stood there.  I didn't cry.  I didn't scream in excitement.  I didn't really do anything....I just stood.  I'm not sure what I expected my reaction to be, but I don't think I would have guessed that in a million years.

"Candice, are you still there?", Brandy was asking.  "Oh yeah, I'm here!", I replied.  When I got my thoughts straight, I finally managed to ask her what exactly low risk meant.  Similar to the AFP testing, the results come back categorized into risk factors.  I fell into the lowest risk category across the board.  Less than 1 in 10,000.  Yes you read that correctly, and I didn't accidentally type an extra zero.

I'm not sure if it was because I was expecting bad results or if I had written the whole situation off and was expecting good results.  I'm not sure what exactly had subconsciously gone on in my mind, but I do know that God had worked on me.  I think now, that I had finally come to terms with our situation. I had finally come to realize that I could not control the outcome of this situation (something that I have always struggled with).  I had begun to rest in the knowledge that God would bring us through any situation, either situation.  And I had started thinking about the beautiful life that we could still have even if our sweet girl did have "designer genes".

 I didn't know what the outcome was going to be and that was okay. And to be honest, we still don't know what the outcome will be. But we do have a little better picture into what is going on inside of me.  When I talked to Mandy this evening, she was so upbeat and encouraging (as she always is).  I told her that the doctor at ECU had offered us an amnio and she said that she wouldn't do that in a million years with the cards that we now hold in our hands.  And we're on the same page with her.  Obviously, there will be a tiny part of us that wonders until the day our girl is born.  But that won't steal our joy, for our joy rests in the Lord and is not contingent on situations or circumstances.  And we are just as blessed now as we would have been with a different report.  And we will be just as blessed at the time of birth if our baby has Down Syndrome as we would be with a typically developed child.

So, we thank each and every one of you for all of your prayers.  We have had countless texts, emails, Facebook messages (public and private) sharing your thoughts, prayers, and stories with us. I have even gotten messages from complete strangers....literally!  People that neither of us know from Adam that have shared their story, how they are relentlessly praying for us, and given us scripture.  And we are so grateful.  So this Christmas, we received an early Christmas gift.  One that wasn't wrapped up in shiny paper tied with ribbon and placed under the tree.  This Christmas we are praising God for good news- on a multitude of levels.  The good news that we received this week as well as the Good News that He has given to the world. Merry Christmas {a little early} Y'all!