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Sunday, August 31, 2014

An Anniversary Present Like None Other

Mom and Dad's 34th anniversary was on Saturday, August 30 so Jacob and I had planned to go up to see them on Sunday, August 31.  Little did they know what was in store for them.  We had been busy at work during the week on a DIY that I was replicating from Etsy.  To tell them the news, we created a dark stained wooden sign that read: "The best parents get promoted to grandparents."

After it was complete, I wrapped it up in paper.  Might I mention that I didn't have any normal tape, so masking tape it was!  And I didn't have enough tissue paper of one variety, so I used about 10 different kinds of tissue paper.  Then, I put it in an unwrapped Morgan Meats box and taped it with masking tape.  To say the least, this package looked slightly unloved.

We brought the box in and my Dad immediately said, "What's that for?"  I told him that we had gotten them an anniversary gift and his response was something like, "Take it back. We don't need any gifts." Let's just say I think he quickly changed his mind on that statement!  So, Mom and Dad began opening the present and I tried to discreetly take a video under the guise of taking a picture.  So, I'll let the video do the rest of the talking....

Needless to say, I was an emotional wreck. My stomach was in knots before telling them and I was SO nervous. Jacob kept saying, "Candice, you're not a 16 year old girl who has shacked up and gotten knocked up." But, as the day transitioned on, my nervous and worries began shifting towards joy and excitement. My mom confirmed that my inner most feelings were completely normal and reassured me that they would begin changing and I was going to be a natural.

I must say, that August 31 is a day that tops the charts in my life. My parents are going to be unbelievably amazing grandparents.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

All Signs Pointed to "Yes"

So there were an unbelievable number of signs that may have eluded to the fact that I was pregnant. I don't know if I chose to ignore them because I had convinced myself that I wasn't or what.  But, here is a rundown of the craziness that probably does not include everything.
  • Well you can always rest assured that if I try to be proactive, it will turn around on me.  Jacob and I decided to sign up for Disability Insurance under the premises that we could wait 4 years to have a baby and STILL come out equal to what we had paid in.  Then, if we decided not to have a child, we would still have come out cheaper than if we did have a child- haha!  You see how that worked out, right?  I literally BARELY made the cut-off for the whole pre-existing condition thing. And thank the Lord- literally, I'm so thankful- that this amazing company doesn't have a 9 month exclusion policy.
  • On a similar note- After my latest stint in the hospital we realized that a medical bridge policy would most likely be beneficial because you never know what's going to happen.  And it would have almost covered all of my hospital bills for only $10/mo.  Again, I literally just BARELY (like by 4 days) made it in for the pre-existing condition clause. 
  • The first thing that I noticed... sore boobs (Yeah.  You didn't want to hear that.  But, it's true.)
  • My friend Rebecca texted me one morning and told me that she had a dream that I was pregnant and that I was wearing a black shirt.  I sent her a text back, laughingly of course, of me wearing a black shirt.  
  • After going out to eat Mexican with some of my friends from Comfort, I began feeling yucky. I got pretty nauseous on the car ride back to school and by the time I got in I was feeling dizzy.  So, I ended up in the floor of the office with my feet propped up.  
  • Headaches galore.  I had terrible migraines in high school and the start of college but they gradually went away.  My headaches have been under control for the last 4-5 years. Then, all of a sudden, they weren't.  I began having awful, debilitating headaches.
  • Hot/cold spells. 
  • Having to constantly go to the bathroom.  Looking back on it, I'm not sure how I didn't find it unusual that I had to get up and go to the bathroom not one, but TWO times during Ava Kate's (my niece) baby dedication.
  • And finally, the most obvious- a missed period.  
Other than those things, I have not had any crazy symptoms.  Fortunately (knock on wood) I haven't really had any nausea or vomiting besides that one random time.  I have had quite a few dizzy spells, but I really am feeling great.  I think that is God's way of telling me that everything is going to be okay.  My first appointment to confirm everything is September 4.  

Saturday, August 23, 2014

The Day We Found Out...

August 23, 2014

My period was 9 days late.  I had been having cramps.  I was sure it was coming anytime.

I had taken 3 pregnancy tests, all of which had come back negative.

I was positive that I wasn't pregnant...just adjusting to the stresses of a new job and the new hormones of the women that I was working with.  Well turns out, I was positive alright.....just not in the way I thought.

I had been talking and texting with one of my most dear friends, Rebecca, about what I needed to do. She was up to speed on everything, including the morning that I discovered that the pregnancy tests I had been using were almost expired (exp. Sept. 2014).  So I took her advice, and waited until the weekend to see if my period would ever come.  And when it didn't, she highly suggested that I go buy a "more reliable test".  {OK-- I admit, I had been using the Dollar GenTral ones.}

On my way home from the Oriental Farmers' Market, I swung by WalMart and picked up a pack of 2 Equate brand tests.  I figured that if I was pregnant, even the Equate brand should be able to pick it up since I was 9 days late. And of course, I double checked the expiration date- Sept. 2016.  I went on home, not thinking a thing in the world. I mean, 3 negative tests that weren't technically expired yet. And, we had not been trying to get pregnant.  After all, we had agreed that children weren't necessarily in our game plan for the future.

So, you can believe my utter shock and dismay when I took the pregnancy test, set a timer, went and ate half a piece of pizza, and came back to see this:

I stood there...staring. Surely this wasn't right.  The new life that I was about to embark on flooded over me at once.  And I broke down.  I mean, ugly cry.  I hadn't planned on this.  I wasn't prepared.  I wasn't good enough.  And so, I called Rebecca and everything came out.  My fears, my insecurities.  And as I walked up and down Spann Road, she just listened and offered advice when I stopped blubbering.  In fact, I'm surprised all of Trenton doesn't know by now.  She also texted me a picture of the "baby bible" which she let me borrow.

After calming down, I got off the phone with Rebecca and knew that I needed to find some way to tell Jacob.  Since he was on his way home from the Jacksonville Farmers' Market, I decided to make a sign that said "Welcome Home, Dad" and attach the pregnancy test to it.  I hung it on the door to the back bedroom thinking he would have to go back there when he got home.  Well, change of plans.  The closer he got, the more I knew that my plan would never work.  I would start crying when I saw him, and the surprise would go out the window.  So, after realizing that I still hadn't gotten my coolers out of the car, I decided to move the sign out to my car window.  I also added a disclaimer to the bottom.
Original Sign
New, Modified Sign

I also took a video, knowing that I would most likely want it one day in the future.

Throughout the day, I continued to process.  I broke out in random bouts of crying (even waking up multiple times during the night).  But, I'm getting ahead of myself.  Trent and Rebecca invited us over for dinner (y'all we are so blessed by their friendship).  Before going to dinner, Jacob and I went to Target (per Rebecca's advice) to get pre-natal vitamins.  And of course, while we were there we saw 3 families that I knew for a total of 10 people, and I looked like a hot mess.  The pharmacist helped me pick out the vitamins until I could get to the doctor for a prescription.  Then, we headed over to the Scott Farm.  Trent and Jacob ate a deer roast with vegetables that Mrs. Anita fixed, while Rebecca and I ate Chick-Fil-A.  And might I say that she even brought me a Caffeine-Free Diet Coke.  The dinner, conversation, and laughter (there is ALWAYS laughter when the 4 of us get together) was much needed.  Right before we left, Claire gave us our first present-- a bear teething ring (Claire Bear!).

The night did not get any easier and all kinds of emotions bowled me over.  Jacob did his best to comfort me and tell me that everything was going to be more than okay.  And I just sat, listened, and continued to process.  I mean, was I really pregnant?